Good Afternoon, Alex Katz
So George left for a few days. Ahhh. Le Kid and I hung out with friends all weekend - went to the zoo, went hiking, planted some things, went to the farmer's market, played chess. We had lots of snuggles. It's sort of like all our other weekends - no George in sight. Sometimes he would make a cameo for meals, but much of the time he seemed glum about it. No negativity. No heaviness. Just friends who I love. And Le Kid, who is made of fairy dust. When I think of him, that he is healthy and happy and safe, I wonder how I can focus on the pathetic shit so much. I should be grateful every day and I don't mean that in a shitty yoga teacher kind of way. I really mean it.
Do I miss George? No, I don’t. I miss the thought of having another person there. A partner. But it’s not like he was a partner really. He paid for and still does pay for things. He is a patron of St. Frankie. But he was in no way otherwise engaged with us. I’ve had relationships before with kind, present people. People who wanted to partner with me. I just didn’t want that then. I wanted something challenging and difficult didn't I? I wanted to win someone over. In the end, it was stupid. And George is not a bad person. In fact, he's a good person. If you met him at a bar, you'd want to know him. He's a shitty husband but a great person. Does that make sense? Those are the worlds of our mutual friend LEM: Great guy, shitty husband.
Do I miss George? No, I don’t. I miss the thought of having another person there. A partner. But it’s not like he was a partner really. He paid for and still does pay for things. He is a patron of St. Frankie. But he was in no way otherwise engaged with us. I’ve had relationships before with kind, present people. People who wanted to partner with me. I just didn’t want that then. I wanted something challenging and difficult didn't I? I wanted to win someone over. In the end, it was stupid. And George is not a bad person. In fact, he's a good person. If you met him at a bar, you'd want to know him. He's a shitty husband but a great person. Does that make sense? Those are the worlds of our mutual friend LEM: Great guy, shitty husband.